The Opposite of Love

For five years, our office secretary attempted to make my weekend-boarding life miserable. I convinced myself that her crankiness was just a product of her midlife crisis.

It was late for me to realize that my suffering was also a product of my false humility: I did not assert my right to be treated fairly. 

In life, we need to accept that there are people who are cranky and mean not for any other reason, but simply because they are lazy. Lazy people aren’t nice because they don’t want to exert any effort to be nice and lovable. They can’t accept the fact that communication is a skill  that everyone needs to practice and learn.

Lazy people are unhappy. They simply accept things as they are, and pretend they are humble and peace loving.

I saw spoiled brats being raised by parents who pretend to love their children. The fact is that, they’re simply lazy to exercise their authority to discipline their children. “Give them what they want. Let’s not quarrel.”

The opposite of love is not hate; it’s laziness. Jesus showed us his love through diligence in confronting his disciples’ misunderstanding, the Pharisees’ hypocrisy and the peoples’ indifference.

Love doesn’t need to be extraordinary. Remembering anniversaries, birthdays and significant dates requires diligence. Saying “I love you”, kissing and hugging, smiling, appreciating and nodding are simple acts of love which could mean heaven to our loved ones…

Loving Father,
We’re always grateful for the diligence

Of Your Son in confronting our indifference
And healing our woundedness.
We may not get tired in loving You
Through our simple acts of kindness,
In Jesus’ Name.
Amen.

photo: ralphsblogspot| posted by john b. bejo

The Opposite of Love

For five years, our office secretary attempted to make my weekend-boarding life miserable. I convinced myself that her crankiness was just a product of her midlife crisis.

It was late for me to realize that my suffering was also a product of my false humility: I did not assert my right to be treated fairly. 

Lazy people are unhappy. They simply accept things as they are, and pretend they are humble and peace loving.

I saw spoiled brats being raised by parents who pretend to love their children. The fact is that, they’re simply lazy to exercise their authority to discipline their children. “Give them what they want. Let’s not quarrel.”

The opposite of love is not hate; it’s laziness. Jesus showed us his love through diligence in confronting his disciples’ misunderstanding, the Pharisees’ hypocrisy and the peoples’ indifference.

Love doesn’t need to be extraordinary. Remembering anniversaries, birthdays and significant dates requires diligence. Saying “I love you”, kissing and hugging, smiling, appreciating and nodding are simple acts of love which could mean heaven to our loved ones…

Loving Father,
We’re always grateful for the diligence

Of Your Son in confronting our indifference
And healing our woundedness.
We may not get tired in loving You
Through our simple acts of kindness,
In Jesus’ Name.
Amen.

Dead And Back Again

I had a gift of conversation this morning with a man gifted with a Near Death Experience (NDE). After  the accident, Engel’s friends told him he was unconscious for about 30 seconds. But to him it was hours or longer, floating in nothingness, fully aware of the feelings of happiness, kindness, love and contentment.

"I felt so happy and peaceful that I never wanted to leave that place anymore." He said. "No, it was not like a dream. I was fully aware", he added. When he became conscious at  hospital to be operated on, he expected to go back into that 'place' again. But, the sedation did not bring him back there.

I thanked him for the conversation and hugged him. I said, it's a gift I have wanted to experience but was always afraid.

Engel's experience is not something new, of course. In fact, my grandmother told me of this identical experience too, years ago. Since, then she started healing people. 

Elisabeth Kübler-Ross travelled around the world to interview people from different races, cultures and religious orientations who had identical experiences.

After my conversation with Engel, one was clear to me… death is nothing to afraid of…

Father,
Thank You for blessing us with

The experience of Your presence.
When our time will come, we may be ready to face You
And answer Your question: have you loved?
In Jesus’ Name.
Amen.

photo: WatsonJournal madagascar cave | posted by john b. bejo

Dead And Back Again

I had a gift of conversation this morning with a man gifted with a Near Death Experience (NDE). After  the accident, Engel’s friends told him he was unconscious for about 30 seconds. But to him it was hours or longer, floating in nothingness, fully aware of the feelings of happiness, kindness, love and contentment.

"I felt so happy and peaceful that I never wanted to leave that place anymore." He said. "No, it was not like a dream. I was fully aware", he added. When he became conscious at  hospital to be operated on, he expected to go back into that 'place' again. But, the sedation did not bring him back there.

I thanked him for the conversation and hugged him. I said, it's a gift I have wanted to experience but was always afraid.

Engel's experience is not something new, of course. In fact, my grandmother told me of this identical experience too, years ago. Since, then she started healing people. 

Elisabeth Kübler-Ross travelled around the world to interview people from different races, cultures and religious orientations who had identical experiences.

After my conversation with Engel, one was clear to me… death is nothing to afraid of…

Father,
Thank You for blessing us with

The experience of Your presence.
When our time will come, we may be ready to face You
And answer Your question: have you loved?
In Jesus’ Name.
Amen.

Don’t Get Slapped

I love Jesus' sense of humor. Well,  most people missed it. Try this: "If a soldier demands that you carry his baggage for a mile, carry it two miles." Imagine taking his baggage a mile away from his destination!

Another worse misunderstood statement of Jesus which developed into a dysfunctional culture is this: "If someone slaps you on the right cheek, offer the other cheek also" Did Jesus do it? No. But some Christians misinterpreted it and adapted false humility.

This is how being slapped on the RIGHT cheek. A backhand slap sends a strong cultural and psychological signal to its recipient: “We are not on the same level.” “I am the master, you’re a slave.” “I am rich, and you’re slum.” “I am somebody, and you’re nobody.”

So, when Jesus said, ‘offer the OTHER cheek ( the left cheek),’ Jesus was telling us": “Don’t get slapped!”  Tell the slapper:  “You’re not better than I in anyway! We have the same dignity!”

“In Jesus' time, and still today in the Middle East, such a gesture is one of the highest forms of contempt.” Equals hit each other with open right hand slaps.

This jest is about equal dignity, assertiveness and freedom, not false humility…

Father,
Forgive us for missing some of Your humor.
It’s funny indeed to think that we take life so seriously.
From now on, we’ll strive not to be slapped with
The unfairness and inequality the world.
We promise to respect the human dignity and freedom,
And be assertive of our right,
In Jesus’ Name.
Amen.

photo: web| posted by john b. bejo

Don’t Get Slapped

I love Jesus' sense of humor. Well,  most people missed it. Try this: "If a soldier demands that you carry his baggage for a mile, carry it two miles." Imagine taking his baggage a mile away from his destination!

Another worse misunderstood statement of Jesus which developed into a dysfunctional culture is this: "If someone slaps you on the right cheek, offer the other cheek also" Did Jesus do it? No. But some Christians misinterpreted it and adapted false humility.

This is how being slapped on the RIGHT cheek. A backhand slap sends a strong cultural and psychological signal to its recipient: “We are not on the same level.” “I am the master, you’re a slave.” “I am rich, and you’re slum.” “I am somebody, and you’re nobody.”

So, when Jesus said, ‘offer the OTHER cheek ( the left cheek),’ Jesus was telling us": “Don’t get slapped!”  Tell the slapper:  “You’re not better than I in anyway! We have the same dignity!”

“In Jesus' time, and still today in the Middle East, such a gesture is one of the highest forms of contempt.” Equals hit each other with open right hand slaps.

This jest is about equal dignity, assertiveness and freedom, not false humility…

 

Father,
Forgive us for missing some of Your humor.
It’s funny indeed to think that we take life so seriously.
From now on, we’ll strive not to be slapped with
The unfairness and inequality the world.
We promise to respect the human dignity and freedom,
And be assertive of our right,
In Jesus’ Name.
Amen.

Dictum Roundup

Along this blog, there are lines that stand out from the rest. They are stand alone; quoted, twitted, posted and blogged. I prefer the word DICTUM to describe them.

Dictums are powerful. They are short but penetrating. Sometimes they come like soothing breeze of mid noon air, sometimes they come like fangs:
They bite through and through until they crack our bones.
Dictums break only to mend, burn only to soothe, bleed only to heal.
Some genuine great dictums are born out from the burning lava of human pain and need to comprehend life;
Some gently sprout from the loam of fertile spirits.
Like diamonds, genuine dictums are timeless, boundless and fearless...

Here are a few for this first round up:

1. ‎ "In our world where everything is a number,
   struggle to be a plus to anybody, rather than a minus."
2. “People come, people go. Life melts like snow.
   From the Earth below, to Heaven it goes...”
3. “We don't need a conflict-free world.
   What we need are people who brave the waves of conflicts,
   determined to reach the shore of understanding and reconciliation.”
4. “Eventually, we'll all be a part of someone else's memory;
   and our names will be written in their books.
   We'll either be a hero, a cameo or a tyrant. The good thing is:
   we could choose our role before and while it is written.”
5. “Pray. Don't under estimate the power of prayer. Pray.”

• “Dear Jesus,
  Keep my words sweet,
  my tongue undeceiving and my smile true.
  Keep my works loving, my arms strong, and my hands clean.
  Keep my heart beating, my mind missing and my spirit singing.
  Keep me with you, saved, loved and forgiven.
  Amen.”

  photo: screenshot | posted by john b. bejo

Dictum Roundup

Along this blog, there are lines that stand out from the rest. They are stand alone; quoted, twitted, posted and blogged. I prefer the word DICTUM to describe them.

Dictums are powerful. They are short but penetrating. Sometimes they come like soothing breeze of mid noon air, sometimes they come like fangs:
They bite through and through until they crack our bones.

Dictums break only to mend, burn only to soothe, bleed only to heal.
Some genuine great dictums are born out from the burning lava of human pain and need to comprehend life;
Some gently sprout from the loam of fertile spirits.
Like diamonds, genuine dictums are timeless, boundless and fearless...

Here are a few for this first round up:

1. ‎ "In our world where everything is a number,
   struggle to be a plus to anybody, rather than a minus."

2. “People come, people go. Life melts like snow.
   From the Earth below, to Heaven it goes...”

3. “We don't need a conflict-free world.
   What we need are people who brave the waves of conflicts,
   determined to reach the shore of understanding and reconciliation.”

4. “Eventually, we'll all be a part of someone else's memory;
   and our names will be written in their books.
   We'll either be a hero, a cameo or a tyrant. The good thing is:
   we could choose our role before and while it is written.”

5. “Pray. Don't under estimate the power of prayer. Pray.”
   

“Dear Jesus,
Keep my words sweet,
my tongue undeceiving and my smile true.
Keep my works loving, my arms strong, and my hands clean.
Keep my heart beating, my mind missing and my spirit singing.
Keep me with you, saved, loved and forgiven.
Amen.”

Paranoia to Metanoia

Perhaps, I have already met some of the worst paranoid people in the society.

Bogs would not eat the food we gave him unless my mother would taste it first. Aldrin would spend his energy snooping into Juvy’s  posts for something negative, dissect every metaphor, turn it into poison, drink it and then run around yelling: “Heeeey! Juvy wants to kill me!”

People with low-self esteem have hard time accepting themselves, their identities, families, sexual orientations, educations, titles or physical appearances. They deplete easily.

The good news is that paranoia is curable.

Metanoia literally means ‘a change of mind.’ And the way to metanoia is humility. Since paranoia grows from the lack of self-love and security, true humility heals a paranoid person.

I read somewhere, “humility is the truth, and the truth is Jesus loves you…” So, if Jesus loves me, then why should I be insecure or afraid or weary of what others would say about me?  Once this truth sips into one’s soul, healing happens. Metanoia happens… The experience of being genuinely loved secures the person. It makes him lovable and therefore there’s no need for him to climb into his tree of paranoia…

Father,
Make us secure in Your love,
Let us EXPERIENCE it in a special way.
May Your love melt our fears and worries,
And help us channel our energy into things
That would really help our fellowmen,
In Jesus’ Name.
Amen.

photo: as watermarked | web | posted by john b. bejo

Paranoia to Metanoia

Perhaps, I have already met some of the worst paranoid people in the society.

Bogs would not eat the food we gave him unless my mother would taste it first. Aldrin would spend his energy snooping into Juvy’s  posts for something negative, dissect every metaphor, turn it into poison, drink it and then run around yelling: “Heeeey! Juvy wants to kill me!”

People with low-self esteem have hard time accepting themselves, their identities, families, sexual orientations, educations, titles or physical appearances. They deplete easily.

The good news is that paranoia is curable.

Metanoia literally means ‘a change of mind.’ And the way to metanoia is humility. Since paranoia grows from the lack of self-love and security, true humility heals a paranoid person.

I read somewhere, “humility is the truth, and the truth is Jesus loves you…” So, if Jesus loves me, then why should I be insecure or afraid or weary of what others would say about me?  Once this truth sips into one’s soul, healing happens. Metanoia happens… The experience of being genuinely loved secures the person. It makes him lovable and therefore there’s no need for him to climb into his tree of paranoia…

 

Father,
Make us secure in Your love,
Let us EXPERIENCE it in a special way.
May Your love melt our fears and worries,
And help us channel our energy into things
That would really help our fellowmen,
In Jesus’ Name.
Amen.

Reality Bites

Sometime ago, a friend asked me if my blog targets a certain kind of person. My answer is: 'Yes' and 'No'

The nature of my blog is to motivate and inspire by connecting, convincing and confronting. It is the product of my struggles, pains, faith and occasional victories. That’s where its grip.

The stories I share here are either based on true to life stories or fables or anecdotes. So, if a person feels a certain post is addressed specifically to her or him, I am sorry, but my message is always for everyone who comes here. God puts us in a certain situation to learn, contemplate and share. Those situations  are gifts  where douses of inspirations come from. (Contemplare et contemplata aliis tradere)

Paranoia turns everything into poison, devours its host then salivates the people around it.

If somebody is stung by anything posted here, then that message must really be for that person; but it could be for anybody else including me. A lie does not bite, reality does.

I will write and continue what I have been doing. On the wall of Mother Teresa's home for abandoned children it's written:

“If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives;
Be kind anyway.

If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you;
Be honest and frank anyway…”

Father,
Make us steadfast against the onslaught of the enemy.
As we do Your work, we may not be obsessed rewards.
We maybe rags, but even rags can be used to clean dirt.
Use us, talk with us and speak through us
In Jesus’ Name.
Amen.

photo: web| posted by john b. bejo

Reality Bites

Sometime ago, a friend asked me if my blog targets a certain kind of person. My answer is: 'Yes' and 'No'

The nature of my blog is to motivate and inspire by connecting, convincing and confronting. It is the product of my struggles, pains, faith and occasional victories. That’s where its grip.

The stories I share here are either based on true to life stories or fables or anecdotes. So, if a person feels a certain post is addressed specifically to her or him, I am sorry, but my message is always for everyone who comes here. God puts us in a certain situation to learn, contemplate and share. Those situations  are gifts  where douses of inspirations come from. (Contemplare et contemplata aliis tradere)

Paranoia turns everything into poison, devours its host then salivates the people around it.

If somebody is stung by anything posted here, then that message must really be for that person; but it could be for anybody else including me. A lie does not bite, reality does.

I will write and continue what I have been doing. On the wall of Mother Teresa's home for abandoned children it's written:

“If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives;
Be kind anyway.

If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you;
Be honest and frank anyway…”

Father,
Make us steadfast against the onslaught of the enemy.
As we do Your work, we may not be obsessed rewards.
We maybe rags, but even rags can be used to clean dirt.
Use us, talk with us and speak through us
In Jesus’ Name.
Amen.

Delay Is Not A Failure

"There's no more seat for you, sir." That was the last thing I wanted to hear after running and jumping to get to that bus. My exhaustion coming from a two day business trip tripled. I missed it just because of that plus size lady who blocked in my way for three seconds!

When I was finally seated after 20 minutes, a former student sat next to me. Sarah was one of the brightest in their class. A few seconds more of honest conversation, tears started falling down her fragile face: a catharsis waiting to be released maybe for weeks or months. Most of her former classmates were already working, while she was still hitting the books, though no fault of her own.

Five minutes before we alighted the bus, there was already a genuine smile on her face, and her eyes started to lighten up again. That was after she learned about 3 things: first, about that plus size lady and the 3 seconds delay; second, that I started working at age 27 because of studies; and lastly, that she shouldn’t be on that bus either if not for some delay.

At home, when I checked out my Facebook, she had this on her wall:

“Yes! Delay is not a failure ”

Heavenly Father,
You have waited for thousands of years to show Jesus to us.
We acknowledge this as the sign of your unfathomable wisdom.
The future may scare us and delay may frustrate us,
But may the Holy Spirit give us
The patience and endurance to wait for better things
You have for us,
In Jesus’ Name.
Amen.

photo: Spiderman | posted by john b. bejo

Postscript: Four months after, I saw her graduation pictures on Facebook :)
Postcript2: August 20, she sent me a message that she already passed the board exam. God is so good