The Broken Umbrella

This morning, Namie cried a lot because her favorite umbrella was broken.
The first thing she said to me was, "Daddy, I'm sorry..."

She cried for several more minutes while hugging me. I told her it was not her fault and it's ok. She was grieving. So, I decided to assist her in taking to rest her favorite umbrella. We took a picture of it and then let her put it away in a recycle bin. I told her that somebody will make good use of her (the umbrella) and that she'll be ok.

What we just did was a kind of a grieving ritual. To us adults, the umbrella is just an umbrella, but to a 5 year old kid like her, it's a part of her reality, an extension of herself, a ‘she’; and losing it is a painful experience that needs to be processed . A ritual is oftentimes necessary to dress a wound.

Like Namie, most of us respond to a loss in the same manner and we need a ritual of grief to help us heal and let go. This process will not only clear some emotional issues, but will also prepare us to welcome and love a new umbrella…

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What Is Your Mantra Again?

A year ago, I wrote about mantra. Now, it's about time to ask: "What is your mantra again?"

Sailing is more complex than driving a car. Aside from its technical complexities, you need to deal with the wind and the current: you need to constantly redirect its course towards your vision.

Life is very much similar to sailing. We may have set our goals from the start, but we need to constantly recheck, redirect and re-affirm our goal. We need to constantly renew our mantra.

What is your mantra?
Kids:  "Toys, toys, toys."
Teenage girls: “His glance, his glance, his glance.”
High school boys: “Fit in, fit in, fit in, fit in.”
As*h*les: “Everyone is an assh*le, assh*le, assh*le, assh*le”
Negaholics: “It can’t be done, it can’t be done, it can’t be done.”
Trolls: “Everything is crap, crap, crap, crap.”

Plus people: “Peace, blessing, kindness, peace…”

How we deal with the world around us depends so much on how we define life. But sad to say, some of our definitions of what life is come from situations and people who haven’t lived life to the fullest yet.

The good news is, we can always redefine life. We can always change our mantra. We can change our lives by changing our mantra… “Peace, blessing, kindness, peace…”

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Revalida

'Revalida' is not a name of a Spanish lady next door. It was the word we used to fear during our philosophy days. It’s the ultimate exam to re-validate our holistic knowledge for the degree.

It seems that life presumes everyone has flunking grades. Everyone needs re-validations. Everyone, every vow, every promise, every love needs to be re-validated (re-valida).

I witnessed several relationships which started like Hollywood love story and ended up in horror. After the 'yes,' after the honeymoon they slowly went into hibernation; they became  less and less expressive of their affections: less kisses, less 'I miss you's, less ‘I love you's’, less texts, less calls. They lost steam along the way.

Relationship is like  a hungry bear. It needs to be continuously fed . It's not that human being easily forgets. It's just that with the barrage of data coming in everyday, anyone easily gets buried and needed to be pulled out from the rubbles. Revalidation feeds our needs to give and to receive.

Kids knew we love them, but they needed to be reassured every time. Husbands and wives have made the vow in public already, but they need to re-validate that vow every once in a while in bed, in social networking, in text, while walking, while having groceries, while eating and especially while arguing. We re-validate our love whenever there’s an occasion… every time is an occasion.

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UnEnchanting

For days I have been abnormally dormant. I was depressed, angry, high strung and uninspiring. I thought I have nothing more to say, I have nothing more to give, I have nothing more offer.

It was not until this morning that I am able to recover and found out what was really going on. For days, some real life issues got into my nerve. And in my desire to prove how wrong those people are, I engaged with them.  I went into their level of relating until it made me like them: angry, high strung, uninspiring… un-enchanting.

Thanks to Guy Kawasaki. For years, he’s been enchanting people around him. I followed him on Google Plus and all I can say is he is the man whom this line talks about “In our world where everything is a number, struggle to be a plus to anybody, rather than a minus.” He’s a plus.

Here’s an infographic from this enchanting Guy. Click on it and simply hover your mouse over it until your mouse turns like a magnifier with a plus to zoom.

Be enchanting

Formula of a Happy Life

 

Learn to add beautiful memories each and everyday;
Smile a lot, bring presents, pick a flower, help a stranger;
Plan a surprise, dance, sing, swim and go fishing.
Nothing binds as tight as the chains of happy moments shared together.

Subtract wrinkles, frustrations, worries and envy;
Haters are like cars trapped in the traffic;
They burn energy and time but nowhere they go.
Walk, run, ride a bike, skip the elevators,
You burn energy faster and make leaner bodies.

Multiply friends, kindness and goodwill.
Join a cause, plant a tree, adopt a pet.
Write a poem for your loved one,
Read and tell stories for children and for the world.
This multiplies our ripples and gives hopes to everyone.

Divide your time according to your priority:
Go to church, plan a date, come to work on time.
Fulfill a promise especially to a child.
Divide your problems and solve them one at a time.

And don't forget that life's greatest equation
Is not measured by money or certificates,
But by the number of people we helped to be better persons.
A candle's true power is measured not on how wide or strong  its light is,
But on how many candles it shared its light with.

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Formula of a Happy Life

Learn to add beautiful memories each and everyday;
Smile a lot, bring presents, pick a flower, help a stranger;
Plan a surprise, dance, sing, swim and go fishing.
Nothing binds as tight as the chains of happy moments shared together.

Subtract wrinkles, frustrations, worries and envy;
Haters are like cars trapped in the traffic;
They burn energy and time but nowhere they go.
Walk, run, ride a bike, skip the elevators,
You burn energy faster and make leaner bodies.

Multiply friends, kindness and goodwill.
Join a cause, plant a tree, adopt a pet.
Write a poem for your loved one,
Read and tell stories for children and for the world.
This multiplies our ripples and gives hopes to everyone.

Divide your time according to your priority:
Go to church, plan a date, come to work on time.
Fulfill a promise especially to a child.
Divide your problems and solve them one at a time.

And don't forget that life's greatest equation
Is not measured by money or certificates,
But by the number of people we helped to be better persons.
A candle's true power is measured not on how wide or strong  its light is,
But on how many candles it shared its light with.

Love in Kind

Love creates and takes part in someone's joy,
It expounds our world and makes us see stars hidden in clouds;
It does not destroy nor curse nor belittle.
It binds, embraces and frees people.

Love is like an open hand
Ready to hold, willing to accept and let go...
Love gets angry, but does not hate.
Love listens to giggles and cries and teardrops;
And understands their rhythms as well as their silence.

Love in the morning when you kiss your dear ones.
Love before you leave, kiss goodbye and embrace.
Love when you're away: bring their faces in your memories.
Love when you're home; tell them how you miss them.

Love in kind, love in action, love in thoughts,
Love always, love while they’re still around….

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Love in Kind

Love creates and takes part in someone's joy,
It expounds our world and makes us see stars hidden in clouds;
It does not destroy nor curse nor belittle.
It binds, embraces and frees people.

Love is like an open hand
Ready to hold, willing to accept and let go...
Love gets angry, but does not hate.
Love listens to giggles and cries and teardrops;
And understands their rhythms as well as their silence.

Love in the morning when you kiss your dear ones.
Love before you leave, kiss goodbye and embrace.
Love when you're away: bring their faces in your memories.
Love when you're home; tell them how you miss them.

Love in kind, love in action, love in thoughts,
Love always, love while they’re still around….

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Heaven or Hell?

When I asked, "Where do you think MOST PEOPLE will go when they die,  to Heaven or Hell?;  most of our students answered: "To Hell!"  "That's sad," I said. And then I made a follow up question: "In your family, where do you think most of them will go?" They all answered, "To Heaven!" 

Most  people I asked of the same questions, gave me with the same answers. Most seem pessimistic about the fate of the world. But, I believe otherwise. I do believe that in spite of the bad news we heard everyday, good people abound and outnumber the rotten ones.

First, it's because Jesus died for ALL  John 2:2  and God will always seek out the lost  Luke 15:11-32.   And at the end of the world, The Lamb will overcome them because He is Lord of lords and King of kings  Revelation 17:14.
Second, everyone, even the hardened criminals or atheists, hopes to go to Heaven.
And lastly, because nobody wants his/her loved ones to go to hell...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~ There’s a Heaven, Don’t Worry :) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Heaven or Hell?

When I asked, "Where do you think MOST PEOPLE will go when they die,  to Heaven or Hell?;  most of our students answered: "To Hell!"  "That's sad," I said. And then I made a follow up question: "In your family, where do you think most of them will go?" They all answered, "To Heaven!" 

Most  people I asked of the same questions, gave me with the same answers. Most seem pessimistic about the fate of the world. But, I believe otherwise. I do believe that in spite of the bad news we heard everyday, good people abound and outnumber the rotten ones.

First, it's because Jesus died for ALL John 2:2  and God will always seek out the lost  Luke 15:11-32.   And at the end of the world, The Lamb will overcome them because He is Lord of lords and King of kings  Revelation 17:14.
Second, everyone, even the hardened criminals or atheists, hopes to go to Heaven.
And lastly, because nobody wants his/her loved ones to go to hell...