The Best School in the World

Soon after I punched my ticket, a commotion developed inside the bus. The passenger behind started to spit a series of "maleducato" expletives to the driver, and more of those came from both parties in the next 7 minutes.

I don't understand much Italian, but I often heard these among them on streets, bus stations and parks, thrown by adults and kids as well. I love Italians, I love their arts, I love their language, I love their women. But this habit makes me lose my appetite for their pizzas and pastas.

It's true, some people are more 'educated' than others, but  I also believe that education is relative to one's culture and life situation. One may be idiot in one thing, but genius in the other. Each of us is an idiot savant.

Everyone should be educated, but true education  should bring us to the great knowledge, the knowledge of respect, equality and tolerance.

If  there is one thing a true educated person does not know, it is to throw expletives like this to his fellow human beings.

With all these thoughts about education, it is good to remember that the best educators are us, parents, and the best school in the world is our home…

Maria

--- June 2012 - Firenze, Italy 

It's been a while that I haven't met a person as happy as a free bird until yesterday.
When I heard and saw Maria told her story in a coffee bar  a few moths ago, I knew she would be an ear and eye catcher. She spoke with conviction, her eyes were sparkling.

It was her first time to talk to a crowd of professionals. And even before she could open her mouth, they were already in deep anticipation; they listened, they smiled, they nodded their heads and celebrated with her.

"This is what I have always wanted to do. This is me!" She declared.

The essence of being human, of being a person is freedom. Freedom to be ourselves, freedom to direct our paths, freedom to express ourselves. This is why when we become authentic, when we truly become who we really are, we are happy. As the author in Copyblogger wrote, "Be funny. Be serious. Be dark. Be outrageous. Be yourself!!!"  Be happy!

Ems and The Two Bumpers

Like any other ordinary morning, Emily called to update me of her previous day. She had two bumpers. One was her boss, and the other was the person she was with for more than 30 years.

After our usual long conversation, I explained to her about the concept of bumpers and rephrased what Thick Nat Hahn said: “When another person makes you suffer, it is because he suffers deeply within himself, and his suffering is spilling over. He does not need punishment; he needs help. That's the message he is sending.”

She understood and made her usual, "ah, so... I see." After lunch she called me back and reported me how she helped her boss heal. And the other one? She drove away and kept her eyes on the road. He is incurable.

Noemi, Un'altra Storia

Yesterday, I dropped by to talk with Noemi, an 87 year old woman living next door where I work. Right after she heard my “ciao” and realized that I was there to listen to her, she poured a barrage of her Italian stories like endless pasta spaghetti. Her stories were long but firm and seamless.

She told me about her young old days. She used to travel with her bike 20kilometers a day for 50 years.  She squeezed my hand like a wrestler does. She was a crusher! And then later, she lifted her skirt to show to me how impeccable her legs are. 

Her memory is superb too: she remembers all the phone numbers of her nieces and nephews. “Manual work and biking made me strong and beautiful,” she said. I agree with her.

After our short chat, I bade goodbye. With renewed enthusiasm, I went home… this time, riding Stefano’s bike :)

Bumpers

Driving back home from my work, a car ahead of us wanted to make an illegal u-turn. The driver did not seem to care. He swerved and droved and turned.  All of us along the way had no choice but to avoid him.

Seeing the driver and the kind of car he drove, it was not surprising. He seemed lost... and his car had several dents and scratches.

These people are called bumpers. Bumpers are people who are emotionally dented, scarred, deformed and lost. And in effect, they want to let other people feel the same way as they do. Like cars with bumpers, they’re conditioned to bump and hurt others. Why?

Thich Nhat Hanh perfectly put this into words: “When another person makes you suffer, it is because he suffers deeply within himself, and his suffering is spilling over. He does not need punishment; he needs help. That's the message he is sending.”

So, next time you encounter bumpers, if you’re unable to help, simply get out of their ways and keep your eyes on the road :)

Two Kinds of Connection

There are only two kinds of connection: bad or good connection.

Like our gadgets, we get an erratic reception if the connection is bad; on the other hand we get the benefits of accurate and enjoyable data transfer and reception if our connection is good.

In life, it's the same. We have hundreds of people around us, and we're connected in one way or another. The connection is bad with another person when we feel stressed out, imbalanced or if we have the need to be someone else when we’re around these people.

The connection is good with another, however, if we feel energized, inspired, understood, genuine,  beautiful and actualized. The universe is a happy and abundant place, but we need to get connected to it through the right person, in the right place at the right time. We call this frequency.

The law of the universe is simple: avoid bad connection and seek good connection. In the same manner,  if you think your presence in someone's life is a minus rather than a plus, it's charity to leave.

Great Love Story

Aside from Brams Stoker’s Dracula, I say one of the most beautiful love stories I’ve ever seen is Hancock.

Hancock? Is it a love story? Well, it depends on how you consider the movie. Hancock is a love story peppered with flying and fighting effects for the people who always want to see action on the big screen. But if you dig deeper, it’s a beautiful love story. And most of all, it’s a kind of story I witness myself in real life.

It’s a story of two people, John Hancock and Mary, made as pair immortals. They have superpowers, but they loss their powers and become humans when they get  too close to each other. They should maintain their distance in order to remain in their immortal state. In the end, even with great love for each other, John had to stay away from Mary in order to let her live… and for John to be save the world.

Love is not always holding hands, nor always being together the whole day, nor always together in bed. Love is also space, breath, trust and remembering.  If love is true, distance is an illusion. If love is true, the connection is not anymore physical: it’s spiritual and profound.

Khalil Gibran has a beautiful line for this:

“But let there be spaces in your togetherness,
And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.
Love one another but make not a bond of love:
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls…”

Love is also space, breath, trust and remembering…

11 Hour Stop-over

Among the wonderful people I met and had lively conversations with during my 11 hour stop-over in Dubai International Airport were Jacky, a Filipina serving coffee at Segafredo, who shot me a smile and helped me identify the free Wi-Fi connection;  next, Federica, an Italian writer based  in Australia, who asked me to help her with her Mac connection.

And lastly, was Rey, a young Chinese businessman who just bought a ship in Venice, we discussed about money and the necessity of connection in the business world.

Human beings cannot help but connect. In fact, life is in essence a web of connection. It does not matter if the connection is old or new. Connection makes life flowing and this life meaningful.

Love is the strongest connection, and paradoxically, the more immaterial the connection is, the stronger it is. As Friedrich Nietzsche said, “Invisible threads are the strongest ties”.

So, what in heaven did I do with my time? Connecting. God has given us time to connect and reconnect. He gave us hands as well, not to put inside our pockets, but to extend and reach for more hands. Connect… Keep connecting… you’ll be happy :)