I had the opportunity to work with some of the stressful people in the advertising agency this year. The work pressure is for me, inviting. I like the adrenaline rush. What was intoxicating was the way people related with each other. I went home with their agitating voices and contorted faces still in my mind even after days. When I asked the Filipina producer who's been in the industry for more than a decade on how she copes with such people, she simply told me: just "deadma".
Deadma comes from the words ‘dead’ + ‘malice’. Literally, it means ‘to ignore’, ‘never mind’, ‘ close ears, close mouth and looking somewhere’. It means that this is not about you, so don’t make it personal. The wisdom of this expression, in some cases, is life saving. No, it’s not being uncaring. It’s staying alive. You care enough about your work and loved ones, that’s why you need to stay sane and alive.
A close friend on the other side of the globe asked me the other day for an advice on how to survive in an environment which is trying to make her like anybody else: stressed out, intoxicating, blasphemous. She asked what is my ‘mantra’ to survive. I wanted to tell her, “just ‘deadma.’ ”
Father,
We’re grateful for our jobs, colleagues and friends.
Sustain us in your grace to survive and preserve our sanity
As we deal with different personalities and environment.
Heal us, bless us as we struggle to be a blessing to others,
In Jesus’ Name.
Amen.
photo: drowning | posted by john b. bejo
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